Justaskjudy

I found the idea for this at Colleens:
http://www.looseleafnotes.com/

Google the phrase (your name) is........... and see what comes up. There were 88 pages with the phrase "Judy is.....".

Judy is looking to cut a deal. (always!)

Judy is as much fun as a barrel of wind-up cymbal-monkeys, and lots more ...

Judy is personally dedicated to solving the real estate needs of her clients.

Judy is not a problem that is going to go away now. (probably true!)

Judy is going to take some time off until we decide what she is doing next.

Judy is recognized as a leading authority on real estate in Fairfield County, CT.

Judy is dedicated to doing what's right and what will benefit ALL.

Judy is now accepting private jazz piano and vocal students. ...

Judy is a runt. ( not this Judy!)

JUDY is the only radar sensor capable of collecting the metric and ...

Judy is a black belt in Aikido and uses its principles of blending.....

Judy is an active member of the Nutmeg Knitters and the Soundview Knitting ...

Judy is a housewife and dental hygienist

Judy is a pain in the butt. (Now here's one my husband will agree with!)

Judy is gaining so many fans...

Judy is a mystery. ...

Judy is somewhat of a prodigy.

Judy is most emphatically not a submissive character. (How true!)

Judy is somewhat sketchy...

Judy is a teacher of many years experience and is best known for her distinctive color ...

JUDY IS MY FRIEND. (I hope I am friend of many!)

Judy is certainly the people person.

Judy is the greatest.

Judy is an inspiration to me.

Judy is able to help people understand their souls ...

Judy is a USA Triathlon Certified ...

Judy is an intellectual gem, and loads of fun to boot!

Judy is truly a pleasure to work with; she is a happy, intelligent and thoughtful person who ...

Judy is to be featured on nationwide TV in the USA.

Judy is extremely hard working . (and hard-blogging!)

Judy is organically funny. She is funny in her bones funny. Judy is funny without trying to be funny. Judy is just plain fun to be around. ... (Gee whiz!)


Judy is wild (certainly have been)

Judy, is that you? My god, woman, you've gained fifty pounds! (since high school - yes!)

Judy Is A Serial Killer ( believe me, I've thought about it!)

Judy is known for her impeccable integrity, experienced negotiating skills.....

Judy is jealous, very jealous! (Naaaaahhhh, who? Me?)

I shouldn't admit it, but the last time I went trick or treating was at age 20, with a few girlfriends. We went to a distant neighborhood, so we would not be recognized. One of the guys who opened the door to see the four of us said "Aren't you girls a little tall to be trick or treating?" We giggled like kindergartners, and he gave us candy anyway. The area we went to was fairly affluent; some people were giving away hot, home-made doughnuts. They were scrumptious! And we had a good share of candy apples rolled in nuts and full-sized chocolate bars; none of the miniatures for those people. I am getting hungry just thinking about it, so I had better shut up about the goodies. One thing that always stood me in good stead was that my birthday is Oct. 30th, which was our trick-or-treat night. Naturally I was not shy about telling people it was my birthday - so I always got an extra handful of candy. This year, I hope you get all of the treats and none of the tricks!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1. Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

2 . Divorce: Future tense of marriage

3 . Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through the minds of either.

4 . Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

5 . Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he got the biggest piece.

6 . Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power.

7 . Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage.

8. Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.

9 . Ecstasy: A feeling you feel when you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.

10 .Classic: A book which people often praise and seldom read.

11. Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

12. Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

13. Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouths.

14. Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

15 . Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

16 . Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

17 . Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

18. Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.

19. Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

20. Opportunist : A person who starts taking a bath if he accidentally falls into a river.

21 . Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."

22. Pessimist: A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.

23. Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

24. Father : A banker provided by nature.

25. Criminal: A guy no different from the rest...except that he got caught.

26 . Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

27 . Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.

Top: The Cunard Queen Mary, mailed from Southampton, England on August 3, 1953
The postage was 2 pence.

Middle: The Cunard Britannic, mailed from Southampton in 1956, also 2 pence.

Bottom: M/S Skyward (Norwegian Cruise Lines), on her way to St. Thomas, Nassau and San Juan, PR in March 1954. Postage was 10 cents.

Wind river Canyon ....22 1/2 miles long. According to Google, this canyon is in Thermopolis, Wyoming. I sure wish I knew where the fountain was.

Left: Big Sulphur Springs, 18 1/2 million gallons of water every 24 hours, supplies water for plunge and hot house, 36 degrees.

Right: Garden Creek Falls, also in Wyoming

I've learned the lesson: from now on, when I scan photos, I will do them one at a time. This allows for larger photos and the ability to click and make them even larger. ENJOY!

These photos were found in my mom and dad's house after they died. I have no idea who took the pics or where they were taken, but maybe someone will have a clue. A few of them are labeled:

Top left: Garden Creek Falls
Middle: two buffalo
Right:Wyoming Prairie Dog
Middle: First Tunnel, 300 feet long,
solid black granite (and an ancient car)
Right: some sort of fountain, three men
Bottom: no label

I do love the look of these prints. They remind me of the old western movies I used to see every Saturday as a child; Gene Autry and Roy Rogers and Hopalong Cassidy at their best, riding the range in search of the cattle rustlers. Of course, they weren't driving the old jalopy seen here at the mouth of the tunnel, and they had on ten-gallon hats, not Hombergs.

I don't think you can see it well, but each print has a "frame", a series of lines, with small square symbols in each corner. That may have been the norm for printed photos back then, but it makes the photos seem more important somehow.

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuumcleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end you first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right? "Well, it isn't all right so why don't we say, "That hurts, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try doing it like your wife told you to do it?

If at first you don't succeed, then don't take up skydiving!

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three bestfriends, if they're okay, then it's you.

Nope, can't claim this one either!

MY PHILOSOPHY OF HOUSECLEANING!

If you like pumpkins of all shapes and sizes, hurry over to Lorianne's blog - http://hoardedordinaries.com/

to see the Keene, NH Pumpkin Festival in all its glory!

This has got to be one of the most clever E-mails I've received in awhile. Someone out there either has too much spare time or perhaps they are deadly at Scrabble. (It's an oldie - but a goodie):

DORMITORY When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROOM

PRESBYTERIAN When you rearrange the letters:BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER When you rearrange the letters:MOON STARER

DESPERATION When you rearrange the letters: A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES When you rearrange the letters:THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH When you rearrange the letters: HE BUGS GORE


THE MORSE CODE When you rearrange the letters: HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES When you rearrange the letters: CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY When you rearrange the letters: IS NO AMITY

ELECTION RESULTS When you rearrange the letters: LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

MOTHER-IN-LAW When you rearrange the letters: WOMAN HITLER

SNOOZE ALARMS When you rearrange the letters: ALAS! NO MORE Z'S

A DECIMAL POINT When you rearrange the letters: IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES When you rearrange the letters: THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO When you rearrange the letters: TWELVE PLUS ONE

AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:

PRESIDENT CLINTON OF THE USA: When you rearrange the letters (With no letters left over and using each letter only once):
TO COPULATE HE FINDS INTERNS

See below for another article which appeared today, updating the previous one.


ST. PETERSBURG - A 94-year-old motorist struck and killed a pedestrian Wednesday evening, then drove about 3 miles with the body lodged in the windshield until he was stopped at a Sunshine Skyway tollbooth. The driver told officers he thought the body had fallen from the sky, said St. Petersburg police Officer Mike Jockers. "He had no idea he had been involved in an accident," Jockers said. "He doesn't totally understand what happened. "The crash occurred about 8:30 p.m., when the 52-year-old pedestrian attempted to cross 34th Street S from east to west near 46th Avenue S, witnesses told police.The pedestrian made it across two of the southbound lanes before he was hit by a 2002 Chevy Malibu, which was traveling about 45 mph, police said. The impact severed the pedestrian's lower right leg, which remained in the street. His head and arms went through the windshield, while the rest of his body flipped up onto the roof of the car, Jockers said. "The driver continued southbound, as the eyewitness said, like nothing happened," Jockers said. As the car approached the toll plaza, the toll taker thought it was a prank, until he saw the blood. When the driver stopped, the body fell into the car, Jockers said. A veteran traffic investigator, Jockers said it was one of the most gruesome scenes he has worked. Neither the name of the driver nor the name of the victim was released Wednesday. The victim had been living in a motel on 34th Street S. Friends said he had been trying to get to McDonald's for a bite to eat, Jockers said. The driver, who lives in Pinellas Park, told police that he was headed home. Pinellas Park, however, is miles in the opposite direction. "Obviously, he was confused," Jockers said. "Incredibly confused." The driver was taken to Bayfront Medical Center for evaluation. He will probably not face criminal charges, as he appeared unaware that he had been involved in an accident, Jockers said. Times staff writer Graham Brink contributed to this report. © Copyright 2002-2005, St. Petersburg Times

Here is the rest of the sad story.Driver in fatal accident suffered from dementia By ALEX LEARY, JAMIE THOMPSON and YUXING ZHENG Published October 21, 2005

St. PETERSBURG - Ralph Parker had shown signs of dementia before, but his condition worsened dramatically over the past week. Argumentative one minute, calm the next. Alarmed, Parker's son left Idaho on Wednesday to get his 93-year-old father in a safe place, police said. Before he could get here, his dad backed his gold Chevrolet Malibu out of the driveway and went for a drive.It ended horribly. Parker hit a man crossing 34th Street S, severing the man's right leg, then drove 3 miles with the body stuck in the windshield. When police asked Parker what happened, he said the body seemed to drop from the sky.Parker thought it was December and that he was headed home to Pinellas Park, not south toward the Sunshine Skyway bridge, police said. The case is an extreme example of a complicated and enduring issue in Florida and everywhere: When is someone too old to drive? Experts say there is no reliable test or quick answer. Unless something changes, they say, the problem will only get worse. ulia Zumpf was driving south on 34th Street about 8:30 p.m. Wednesday when she saw the gold Malibu unsteady in the road. Drunken driver, she thought. Then Zumpf, 44, saw a pedestrian step off the center median and head across the three-lane road."He didn't even walk straight across, he walked at a 45-degree angle toward the cars," Zumpf. "It reminded me of some cocky kid who walks in front of you."The driver of the Malibu slammed on his brakes, Zumpf said.She thought the driver missed him but suddenly she heard a crash and saw a leg flying in front of her blue Buick LeSabre."It went at least one story in the air," she said. His shoe then popped off before the limb came to a rest on a strip of grass west of the street, in front of Howard Johnson's. The driver kept going, as if not realizing what happened, Zumpf said. She drove several blocks, trying to locate the body, thinking it rolled off the car, and called 911."I thought it was just a hit-and-run," she said.The body was still on the Malibu. The head and shoulders were punched through the windshield, the torso slung backward over the hood. Three miles later, the car approached the Sunshine Skyway toll bridge. As Parker decelerated, the body slumped entirely inside, the man's face pushed up against the dash.The macabre scene looked like a Halloween prank to the toll taker. Then she saw the blood. Police had not released the name of the victim as of late Thursday. He was 52 and lived at the Crystal Inn across the street from the scene of the accident. The man, often seen begging for money on 54th Avenue S, was going to McDonald's for something to eat, police said. Residents at the hotel said his first name was Rudy. They said he was a hard drinker, but a decent man with long ties to St. Petersburg. The fractured windshield obscuring his view, and blood streaming down the console, Parker told police he did not realize what happened until he reached the tollbooth. Even then, he thought a body dropped from above, perhaps a pedestrian overpass, said St. Petersburg police Officer Michael Jockers. "He may have somewhere in his mind have realized it was a crash, but immediately forgot about it," Jockers said. Bruce Bartlett, chief assistant in the Pinellas-Pasco State Attorney's Office, said it was unlikely the state would file charges. No final decision will be made until the police investigation is completed. To charge Parker with leaving the scene of a crash, prosecutors would have to prove he knew or should have known there was an accident. Additionally, he would have to be mentally competent to stand trial. Parker did not appear to know what happened, where he was or why he was there when he spoke with police officers, Bartlett said. Jockers took Parker's driver's license. Short of having the state take it away forever, Parker will have to take a test to show he is still competent behind the wheel. Parker hasn't been cited for any serious driving incidents during the past seven years, according to state records. His history is clean except for an expired tag. He last renewed his license in 2003, at the age of 91. It was set to expire in 2010.A spokesman for the state Department of Highway Safety and Motor Vehicles said the agency would conduct its own inquiry into whether Parker should have had a license."We will investigate this vigorously to see how this could have been prevented, if at all," said spokesman Frank Penela. In recent years, experts have sounded warnings about the risks of elderly drivers and the need for more comprehensive screenings. A state report released last year said Florida was facing a "critical situation with its aging population: the mature at-risk driver."The issue has gotten more attention because older drivers are living longer, buoyed by better medical treatment. Last year, nearly 270,000 people age 85 or older were licensed to drive in Florida. Of those, at least 20 percent are considered "dementia drivers," with a mild to moderate condition, according to a 2004 state report. Yet Florida, like many states, has no comprehensive system for evaluating whether older residents should be on the road.The only age-related requirement is that seniors age 80 or older must pass a vision test when renewing their license, generally every six years.That went into effect Jan. 1, 2004, two months after Parker last renewed his license.But vision tests do not reveal other factors that affect driving, such as Alzheimer's disease, side effects from medication and chronic health problems.While Florida and other states say they would welcome more comprehensive screening, no reliable test exists."There's no foolproof way to predict someone's ability to drive safely," said Dennis McCarthy, co-director for the National Older Driver Research and Training Center at the University of Florida."Many seniors can and do drive well," said Susan Samson of the Area Agency on Aging of Pasco-Pinellas. Experts generally agree about the need for a road driving test. But even that is a snapshot in time that might not indicate whether a driver will forget to take his medication or lose mental alertness. Additionally, more comprehensive state testing would be expensive and time-consuming."If you've lived in Florida for a long time, you know we revolt when the lines at the DMV get too long," Samson said. State driver license examiners are trained to look for signs of mental or physical impairment and can request the driver to take additional tests. But mostly, the state relies on doctors, residents, family and neighbors to report potentially unsafe drivers. In those cases, the state conducts its own examination and a medical board determines whether to pull a license. Doctors can be crucial in determining a person's ability to drive. In Florida, reporting is voluntary. Other states require it. California, for example, demands that medical professionals report all patients who have disorders that can cause "lapses of consciousness," including Alzheimer's disease. A physician who fails to report a required condition can be held liable for damages.Pulling someone's license is serious business, especially for the elderly, experts say. Many older residents need a car to get groceries, fill prescriptions, continue social lives. Some drive when they shouldn't because they feel they have no choice - a lack of public transportation, for example. The loss of a driver's license can lead to a downward spiral, as people stop eating, taking their medications and become isolated. Giving up a license also comes with a psychological cost."Losing your ability to drive is one of the toughest things," McCarthy said. "It tells us we're not healthy, we're not young, we're not capable."Additionally, McCarthy points out that situations like Parker's don't happen often. Older drivers are involved in far fewer accidents than other drivers, such as teens."There's a tendency to sensationalize these types of incidents," he said. "Although this one sounds very tragic, they are very few and far between." Parker was taken to Bayfront Medical Center for evaluation. He suffered only minor scrapes from the accident, but his dementia was cause for concern, Jockers said."He can't even remember the name of the nurse that's been taking care of him all day," Jockers said. Parker's son, 66-year-old R. Thomas Parker Jr., spoke with police investigators on Thursday, relaying his father's recent bouts of dementia.The son could not be reached Thursday, and Jockers said he wished to be left alone. A daughter, who lives in Pennsylvania, declined to comment when reached by the St. Petersburg Times.Their father is a longtime resident of the Mainlands of Tamarac, a 55 and older community off U.S. 19 in Pinellas Park. Neighbors said Parker and his wife, Hazel, moved there in the late 1970s and were active members of the community, attending dances and bingo. When his wife died in June 1998, Parker withdrew. About the only time people saw him was when he would drive by.It seemed his one pleasure."That was the one thing he had," said Jockers, "to get in his car and just drive for the sheer enjoyment of driving."John Logan, who perhaps knew Parker best, said about six weeks ago he noticed newspapers piling up in Parker's driveway. He feared the worst but phoned his neighbor. To his relief, Parker answered."Oh, the newspapers. Yeah, I'll have to get them," Parker told Logan, the last conversation between the two men. "He kind of sloughed it off and said, "I've been doing other things.' "Times researcher Carolyn Edds contributed to this report.© Copyright 2002-2005, St. Petersburg Times

A photo meme, which I found on Paul's site:

http://writingfromthehip.blogspot.com

1. My favorite vacation spot - Kauai

2. My hobby - collecting frogs

3. My occupation - florist

4. A favorite Christmas present - a robe

5. My current home - Raleigh, NC

6. My birthplace - Charleston, WV

The meme was also supposed to include a photo of your favorite meal, which I couldn't find. It varies, but at present it is a chicken chimichanga with refried beans con queso. Heavenly! It was also supposed to include your favorite scent - and mine is either gardenia or honeysuckle.

If you enjoy reading personal accounts of growing up and memories of things long past, visit:


http://douglasaz.blogspot.com

http://holtieshouse.blogspot.com

Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.

A penny saved is a government oversight.

The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are " XL."

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

He who hesitates is probably right.

If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.

Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "Theirs."

Heck no, I sure didn't write this one!

Click on the cartoon to enlarge.

Some fall images, to get you in the mood for the season.
Top left: a pumpkin centerpiece for a wedding last October. I made 13 of these for a wedding this past Saturday.

Top right: mantels decorated for 2 different weddings last fall. The grapevine balls in the top photo stay on that mantel year-round, and instead of moving them for this wedding, I incorporated them. (It was easier).

Bottom left: a fall wreath, used at a wedding reception in a local historic home; the same one as the grapevine-ball mantel.

1. THINGY (thing-ee) n. Female...... Any part under a car's hood. Male..... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj. Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another. Male.... Playing football without a cup.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n. Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner. Male... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n. Female.... A desire to get married and raise a family. Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n. Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book. Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n. Female.... An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion. Male...... A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.

7 . REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n. Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another. Male... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

AND:

He said . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. She said . . .You wear pants don't you?

He said ... Shall we try swapping positions tonight? She said . That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!

He said . ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? She said . ....Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

He said . . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? She said . We don't know; it has never happened.

Nope, didn't write this one either!

I found this in a local newspaper and laughed my fool head off. The Good Docs and Vicki might enjoy it, don't you think? If you know anyone else of the therapy persuasion, pass it along.


Click the picture to enlarge.

I'll leave it up to you!



The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.


As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".


In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.


The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

Another email gem.......I didn't write it, people.

Because of our mountains, we have rivers. The oldest river in the Western Hemisphere, the New River (quite appropriately named, don't you think?) ends in West Virginia. We have the Gauley River, which confluences with the New River in a magnificent cascade to form the Kanawha River, which in turn flows through the center of the State, and directly through the capital city of Charleston, the largest city in West Virginia. These rivers in addition to the Cheat, Blackwater, Tygart, Monongahela, Ohio and countless others offer tremendous recreational opportunities. The tallest building in Charleston is barely 25 floors tall , which, if you think about it, is a plus; how could you possibly build a skyscraper more beautiful than a mountain? The capital city stretches throughout the long river valley encompassing both hill and dale. The Charleston airport, the largest in the State, sits on top of a mountain. The crime rate in Charleston, including the entire population of the Kanawha Valley (around 200,000), reflects that of the entire State, the lowest in America. No more than a handful of murders are committed each year. Charleston has no subway systems, but, truth be known, you can get from one end of town to the other, even in rush hour traffic, in less than twenty minutes. There are three major interstate systems going through Charleston, the smallest city in America to make such a claim. The entire State has six different interstate systems, meaning, from Charleston, you can reach Cleveland, Columbus, Cincinnati, Pittsburgh, Louisville or Charlotte in four hours or less....Ah, but once you leave the interstates, the drive becomes a thing of wonder. Two lane roads, winding up and down the mountains, offer amazing views and historic places, small towns, poor in wealth but rich in history. West Virginia is the birthplace of Mother's Day, in Grafton; and Father's Day, in Fairmont. We have the oldest covered bridge still in use. We have walnut festivals, strawberry festivals, harvest festivals, apple festivals and pumpkin festivals and buckwheat festivals, and arts and crafts fairs and stern wheel regattas and ramp dinners. We have Bridge Day, on the New River Gorge Bridge over 800 feet above the New River; the only standing structure in the United States that, one day a year, allows parachuting and bungee jumping. We have college basketball, and minor league baseball and hockey, and, just like all of America, Friday night high school football. We have white water rafting, and skiing, and hiking, and caves, and waterfalls, and camping in every direction. We have Sundays where a leisurely drive in the car can take eight hours, and only cover 100 miles. We have bed and breakfasts, and resorts, and golf courses, and museums, and the Greenbrier Hotel. West Virginia has more natural beauty and wonder than any person could ever imagine. We have all of this, and yet .... our greatest asset is our people. West Virginians are good people. We care about each other. We talk to our neighbors over the backyard fence. We grow tomatoes for the entire neighborhood. We turn around in each other's driveways, and yell Hi! when we do. We sit on the porch on warm summer evenings, listening to crickets, and watching kids catch fireflies. We loan a hammer, or a cup of sugar. We don't take two-hour lunches, but we do spend a few minutes each day with a cup of coffee, and our feet up on our desk, shooting the breeze. We rarely get in a hurry. We have relatives just down the street. We don't just loan someone a socket wrench, we help them fix their car. We share recipes, and gardening tips, and our last cup of coffee. We baby-sit each other's kids, we housesit each other's dogs while we're on vacation, and we loan each other our cars if we have to get to the drugstore. We ask each other if we need anything as we're going to the market. We celebrate each others accomplishments, and we cry over each other's disappointments. We are a friendly folk. We are West Virginians. Mountaineers are always free! Free to take the time to enjoy life, and hold each moment in our hearts, forever. If you are proud to be a West Virginian, then pass this on. And that is exactly what I have just done! If you are proud of your native state - or the one in which you now live - give us a mini-geography lesson of your own.

IF MY BODY WERE A CAR .......


If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a little dull, but that's not the worst of it.

My fenders are too wide to be considered stylish. They were once as sleek as a little MG; now they look more like an old Buick. My seat cushions have split open at the seams. My seats are sagging. Seat belts? I gave up all belts when Krispy Cremes opened a shop in my neighborhood.! Air bags? Forget it. The only bags I have these days are under my eyes. Not counting the saddlebags, of course.

I have soooooo many miles on my odometer. Sure, I've been many places and seen many things, but when's the last time an appraiser factored life experiences against depreciation? My headlights are out of focus and it's especially hard to see things up close. My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip and slide and skid and bump into things even in the best of weather.

My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. It takes me hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns inefficiently. But here's the worst of it -
Almost every time I sneeze, cough or sputter.....

either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires!


(Nope, didn't write this one either!)

This is the best "Rhymes with Orange" cartoon I have seen in ages.....so in case you can't read it:

"What makes jerks jerks is their belief that they are the center of the universe coupled with their nagging fear that they only play a bit part"

Anybody know a jerk like that?

Thanks to everyone who left a comment on yesterday's post. I left town right after I posted it, and I don't have the time to visit everyone personally today. Seems like reverie posts, as I call them, stir everyone's memories and strike a chord, even if our childhoods were somewhat different. One thing I notice is that no matter what part of the country - or the planet - we are from, we all have things in common. We are more alike than we are different. Too bad we cannot remember that when conflicts arise.

My hair was kept braided all the time, in two pigtails tied with ribbons to match my outfit of the day. Mom sewed almost all my clothing until I was about 10, after which I decided "store-bought" was much preferable to "mommy-made". How wrong I was! She made pretty cotton dresses, with puffy sleeves and rick rack or lace trim, and organdy pinafores to match. A pinafore was a sort of decorative apron, used to catch whatever soil I came in contact with during the day, and thus save the dress from getting dirty. In her theory, I could wear the dress with the pinafore and then another day without it, and have 2 different looks. In practice, I hardly ever got dirty. I could have worn the same dress 5 days in a row and it would still look as fresh as it did the first day. I finally learned to get a little dirty, so that I wouldn't have to wear the same dress 2-3 days in a row!

My school shoes were black patent Mary Janes, polished to a high gloss with petroleum jelly; I wore them with white socks, sometimes trimmed in lace. Can you imagine the girls of today going to school dressed like that? I enjoyed looking like a princess, but of course it had its bad points. If we girls got on a swing, the boys were always watching to see if the skirts would fly up over our faces so they could yell...."I see England, I see France, I see Judy's underpants". I learned quickly to tuck my skirt under my legs so it wouldn't fly up. Forget trying to climb on a jungle-gym in a dress without showing everything - but we did it anyway - mostly when the boys were off playing ball or marbles or jacks. Somewhere I have a photo of some classmates perched on the jungle-gym at school when we were in the fifth grade. Good times......warm memories......and what I am learning through these reveries is that it was a very good childhood.

http://www3.telus.net/camilleallen/camilleallen/index.htm

You won't believe your eyes!

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself, Lillian, you should have remained a virgin. Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy and Billy Carter)

I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: No good in a bed, but fine against a wall. Eleanor Roosevelt

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement. Mark Twain

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. Victor Borge

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. Mark Twain

What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce. Mark Twain

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. Jimmy Durante

I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back. Zsa Zsa Gabor

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. Alex Levine

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. Mark Twain

My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying. Ed Furgol

What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money. Henny Youngman

I am opposed to millionaires...but it would be dangerous to offer me the position. Mark Twain

Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was 'shut up.' Joe Namath

Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. Herbert Henry Asquith

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap. Bob Hope

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. Will Rogers

Don't worry about avoiding temptation...as you grow older, it will avoid you. Winston Churchill

Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty, but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out. Phyllis Diller

The cardiologist's diet: If it tastes good, spit it out. Unknown

By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere. Billy Crystal

(You do know I'm joking, don't you?)

1) When I die, I want to die like my grandfather--who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car." --Author Unknown

2) Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep away from children." --Author Unknown

3) "Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar." --Drew Carey

4) "The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house." --Jeff Foxworthy

5) "If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there is a man on base."

6) "Relationships are hard. It's like a full time job, and we should treat it like one. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks' notice. There should be severance pay, the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp." --Bob Ettinger

7) "My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.'" --Paula Poundstone

8) "A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: "Duh." --Conan O'Brien

9) "Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God.... I could be eating a slow learner." --Lynda Montgomery

10) "I think that's how Chicago and Detroit got started. Bunch of people in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't cold enough. Let's go west.'" --Richard Jeni)

11)"If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead." --Johnny Carson

12) "Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography." --Paul Rodriguez

13) "My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law." --Jerry Seinfeld

14) "Remember in elementary school, you were told that in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic in that? What, do tall people burn slower?" --Warren Hutcherson

15) "Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same." --Oscar Wilde

16) "Suppose you were an idiot ... And suppose you were a member of Congress... But I repeat myself." --Mark Twain

17) "Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Afghanistan." --A. Whitney Brown

18) "You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'" --Dave Barry

19) Do you know why they call it "PMS"? Because "Mad Cow Disease" was taken. --Unknown and presumed deceased

The accountant was describing the way in which my husband and I have communicated for the last 41 1/2 years - and probably the way which many husbands and wives interact as well. I am aware that not all men do it, but it seems to be typical of most. My husband has told me many times that he tunes out half of what I say because much of it is superfluous (to him). This is part of the reason why he claims no memory of some fact I have mentioned to him. The other part is that he seems to have very little memory for anything other than every basketball shot he has ever made. His other memories involve women and great meals he has eaten, but nothing substantial about what he has to do next week, or that we are having company tomorrow.

I know this about him; I filed it in my memory bank a long time ago. Therefore, I am constantly editing what I tell him, so that he might remember the important stuff and does not have to tune out any fluff. I do, however, have to repeat the important items all too often.

So what's your communication style? Have you noticed a difference in your spouse's way of doing it? Has it created problems in your relationship? If so, how do you handle it?

Is this some modern art painting by an undiscovered master? A wall mural, perhaps? No, my friends, this is a photo of liquid crystals, taken with an electron microscope. I think I found this photo on a site recommended by Inanna....... www.livescience.com

Inanna lives at:
http://blackpunkin.blogspot.com and she likes science about as much as I do. But I might have found this link at:
http://artsyscience.blogspot.com - he hasn't been posting much lately though, and I can't remember how long I have had the pic.

When I was in college, I ran across a book with many photos of elements and mineral crystals taken with electron microscopes, and I was hooked from the beginning. The artist in me was drawn (no pun intended) to these images from nature like none other. I remember one in particular got my attention, it was of molybdenum. I have never forgotten that name - though I don't know what it is or what purpose it serves. Guess I should Google it, huh? Anyway, that photo stayed in my mind for years. I had visions of painting something with that as a theme, but I could never do it justice. I was unsuccessful in finding a good photo of molybdenum, but here is one page Google sent me to:


Name: molybdenum
Symbol: Mo
Atomic number: 42
Atomic weight: 95.94 (2) g
CAS Registry ID: 7439-98-7
Group number: 6
Group name: (none)
Period number: 5
Block: d-block

Description:
Standard state: solid at 298 K
Colour: grey metallic
Classification: Metallic
Availability: molybdenum is available in many forms including foil, sheet, wire, insulated wire, mesh, rod, powder, nanosized activated powder, and tube.


How dry is that? So technical and plain. Sure doesn't sound like it would have a beautiful appearance, does it? It reminds me of some people I have met: gorgeous on the outside, but dry and uninteresting on the inside. And on the other hand, some who are plain and unremarkable to look at are the most interesting, intelligent, multi-layered people you could imagine. Isn't there a lesson there somewhere?

While we were out at dinner, my stat counter reached 10,000 hits! Thanks to everyone who clicked on my site since June 3rd; I know that some of you don't stay around long enough to read much, but if you do, I want you to know how much I appreciate that and getting comments too.

First my template shifted so that the archives, etc. are at the very bottom right of the site, and now my sitemeter has disappeared! Last night before I went to bed, I checked the number - and sometime during the night the whole thing disappeared. I have not made any changes to the template - so what gives?? Can anyone offer an explanation?

As Rosanne Rosannadanna would say.....Nevermind! The sitemeter came back on it's own sometime between noon and 3pm today, and I figured out what was causing the archives, etc. to show up at the bottom of the page. It was Hoss's fault! When I put up his birthday post, the link to his site was so long that it displaced my bio, etc. So, Hoss, I am sorry to say I removed your link. I don't think it matters, though,because nearly everyone knows how to find you!

My idea of Paradise is on a beach or a mountaintop in Kauai.

Left: The mountains seem to be sliding into the ocean, and did you notice the color of the water? This photo was taken from the helicopter tour. The colors from that angle are breathtaking.

Right: More great color. This photo was taken from the grounds of the Kileauea Lighthouse, on the northern shore of Kauai.

Bottom: The view from the top of Mt. Weialeale. Before the clouds and mist rolled in, this view was the most gorgeous one I had ever seen. Once again, the colors of the water were unbelieveable, and that, coupled with the myriad greens in the landscape was just drop-dead gorgeous. You can't tell I love Hawaii, can you?

Note: I came back to say that the colors do not show up here like they do in the photos I scanned. That's too bad, because they are unbelieveably beautiful.

A people watcher's nirvana is how the waiting room could be described. From the pimply teenagers taking tests for the first time to a woman at least 85, who had to be led into the building (and therefore was not exactly a good candidate for a new license, in my humble opinion), the parade of interesting humanity marched past. The book I took to pass the time lay in my lap unopened, since the show in the waiting room was just too good to miss. In spite of very cool air conditioning, there were women dressed as if they were going to a nightclub (tank tops so small as to be virtually non-existent) and older women dressed as if winter had set in last night, in coats and various headgear designed to keep the (also non-existent) wind at bay. There were a couple of guys who slept, and who, I imagined had downed the Coronas before smashing the bottles I nearly drove on. I doubt they'll get their new licenses today.

When my number was called, I approached the desk with some trepidation. My examiner (as they are called) was an attractive woman of about 45-50, who apparently has been disappointed a few times in life and wears that on her face like a mask. She had all the personality and animation of a 1950's cartoon robot, with a voice to match. I realize they have a script to follow and God knows they have to say it 100 times a day - or more - but couldn't she have injected a modicum of warmth? I guess that would have been too much trouble. I was able to read all of the eye charts and I recognized 11 or the 12 road signs, so I quickly passed on to the lobby where you wait to have your photo taken.

Believe it or not, I had not remembered about having to have my photo taken. I know, you are thinking "How could she be that dumb? Everyone knows when you go to the DMV they take your photo!" Anyway, I wore a red blouse and no makeup and my hair looked just about like it does when I get out of bed in the morning. Truly. So you can imagine what your pic would look like if you were in that condition (you can't imagine me because you don't know what I look like - do you?) I looked like someone who was just released from Central Prison and I really hate the fact that this photo will be shown to every Tom, Dick and Harry for the next five years! The last photo was bad enough, with the huge, out-of-date, purple eyeglass frames looking like a gigantic bug sitting on my nose. This time, she made me remove my glasses due to the glare. So I looked like a half-blind female Mr. Magoo, trying to locate the camera!

While I was waiting for the finished license, I went to the ladies room. A disaster in the making, it was a horrible mess. Of the two stalls, only one was usable (the other one being padlocked) and the toilet handle had broken off, the top was removed, and the bowl was packed with toilet tissue. You'd better believe I ran out as soon as I looked at it. I decided I could wait to use another facility. I think I know why that stall was padlocked: I bet it is the one that the women examiners use and they have to padlock it to keep it clean. Next time, I'll take a hack saw with me........

Angie http://www.bigredcouch.com/journal tagged me to do this meme, so here goes:
Edit: I just got an email from a friend who read this. He wrote his lists for me and added a new section: 7 people whom I would like to kiss my butt. It was so funny! Feel free to add a bonus round to your lists too!
Seven things I hope to do before dying:
1. See the Pyramids
2.Tour all of Egypt and cruise down the Nile
3. Visit Italy and Greece.
4. Watch my baby get married
5. Be alive for the birth of all grandchildren to come
6. Be debt free
7. Meet some of my fellow bloggers.

Seven things I can do:
1. Arrange flowers
2. Play the piano
3. Draw stuff
4. Grow stuff
5. Run my business
6. Sew
7. Read 2-3 books at the same time
8. (Had to do 8): talk, talk, talk

Seven things I cannot do:
1. Swim well
2. Give a sick cat a pill
3. Cook well
4. Suffer fools easily
5. Sleep standing up
6. Higher math
7. Lower math
8. Know when to shut up (see # 8 above!)

Seven things that attract me to the opposite sex:
1. Intelligence
2. Straight, clean teeth
3. Good hair (or none at all)
4. A pleasing disposition and a streak of humor
5. Reasonably color coordinated
6. If they dance well, I'm putty in their hands
7. Cleanliness is a requirement!

Seven things I say most often:
1. Let the cats out, please
2. Hand me the remote control, please
3. I told you about that last week! Oh, yes I did!
4. What did you say? (I'm hard of hearing, sometimes)
5. Let the cats in, honey
6. I'm sorry, will you repeat that, please? (see above)
7. Hello, Baby (to my younger daughter, on the phone)

Seven celebrity crushes:
1. James Spader
2. Richard Gere
3. John Travolta (as Vinnie)
4. Paul McCartney (in 1963)
5. I just can't think of anyone else right now.
6.The young Al Pacino.
7. Jude Law (before the adultery)

Things You Ponder During Life...


1. Do you need a silencer if you are going to kill a mime?

2. Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

3. How does the guy who drives the snow plough get to work in the morning?

4. If 7-11 is open 24-hrs a day, 365 days a year why are there locks on the door?

5. If a cow laughed really hard, would milk come out her nose?

6. If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?

7. Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

8. Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

9. Why do "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

10. If you can't drink and drive, why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?

11. Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

12. If you have your finger touching the mirror that says "objects in mirror are closer than they appear," how is that possible?

13. If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?

14. Why does your nose "run" and your feet "smell" ?

15. Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing?

16. Why is it called a "building" when its already built?

17. Why do they call them apartments when they are all stuck together?

18. Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

19. How can someone draw a blank?

20. What is another word for "thesaurus"?

21. If 75% of all accidents occur within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away?

22. When they ship styrofoam, what do they ship it in?

Happy Birthday, Gene!