Sunday, March 19, 2006

Some Things...Even Your Best Friend Won't Tell You

There used to be a commercial that started out that way. I don't remember if it was for body odor or bad breath, but it was the catchphrase of the year for a while, sometime in the 50's.

Something happened today that brought it back so quickly my head swam. I was sitting in my recliner (where I have been for most of the last 6 days) and suddenly I smelled an odor that was so offensive I thought one of the cats had used the litter box and didn't bother to cover it up. "Peeeeuuw", I said, to no one in particular...."that really stinks!" I was too tired to get up and change the litter, so I told myself it would dissipate quickly and not be a problem. But I kept smelling it. After about 30 minutes, I decided I had to get up and do something before the smell killed me (it was that bad).

Guess what I discovered? It was my breath; the product of a sinus infection and un-flossed teeth. The combined effects of the antibiotics and the sinus products had done their jobs well enough, and now my nose is working better than it has in 2 months. Suddenly, everything stinks. I detected a faintly pissy odor in the bathroom (I didn't clean this week, of course); the refrigerator is a sitting time-bomb and I expect something will explode in there tonight. I hope it will hold off until tomorrow, so I can clean it out before it comes to life and crawls out of the bowls. Tonight, I went out into the garage to get a drink from an old fridge we keep out there, and I discovered mellowing florist scraps (stems and leaves) in a plastic bin. It should have been thrown in the compost pile 2 weeks ago. That's what happens when you get sick!


Remember when "they" used to talk about smellavision? We would go to see a movie and "smell" the coffee the stars were drinking or sniff the ocean in a beach scene? Well, you had better be glad that Bill Gates hasn't invented "smellthroughurcomputer" already, otherwise you might be signing off about now - or at least clicking goodbye to kenju! And I'll bet you wouldn't even tell me - would you?

30 comments:

The Torch Singer said...

I would tell you.

I am terribly honest!

Michele sent me.......

Get better!!!!!!!!

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

LOL, LOL, LOL. I know what you mean about suddenly being able to smell things you hadn't!!! Good Lord, that was funny, but also, I truly get it! My nose has been much more "open" for many many months now and sometimes it makes things rather difficult, to say the least...

By the way, Judy..I had a similar problem with blogger earlier today trying to post some photo's on Sweeties blog...I waited about an hour or so, and it let me do it then...but it was very very s-l-o-w...lots of problems today with blogger...maybe it's time to make a change...

Jamie Dawn said...

Sniff, sniff.
What's that awful smell?
Oh, good grief! It's coming from my computer.
Is that really YOU, Kenju?
Get some Altoids, pronto!!
I'm glad your nose has cleared.
Keep resting and get completely well.
Oh, and brush and floss your teeth.

Angie said...

Oh wow! That is too funny! Thanks for the laugh. I hope it gets better soon! ;)

Michele sent me.

mar said...

I would tell you. I am very direct but only with people I care about.
Mr. Mar has lost his smell senses due to an accident in oct, and is only slowly getting them back. But he is happy at times when it is better not to smell the surroundings, lol! Michele sent me this time

PI said...

Oh Kenju I do empathise with you. It seems to me a sense of smell is a moveable feast.
We have just had one night of very rich food. We normally eat plain nutritious home cooking. All I can say is - it was me - and I can't wait to get my system flushed out again.
Exit head hung with shame.

road apples said...

Who needs a nose with a description like that. By the time I finished reading your post, I found myself thoroughly grossed out by the scene you painted. True or not, this an excellent example of creative writing. One I will share with my students.

Anonymous said...

Good tale, Kenju! Several years ago, at work, I smelled a dead mouse behind the bookshelves that held perhaps two or three hundred reports, each about 3" thick. Some of the guys were kind enough to do the heavy lifting of getting the reports moved, but we couldn't find the mouse....In the end, it was determined to be a loosened crown on one of my teeth. It had allowed air in to the root of the tooth that then proceeded to decay. Rude awakening!
Cop Car

moon said...

(borrows one of your beautiful fans to wave infront of me as I approuch u to say)...So glad your starting to feel better...but don't be doing all that cleaning all at once to then wear yourself out. Take it easy and slow...you don't want to relapse!.....

T. said...

Oh Kenju! I am glad you are feeling better. But I just woke up and your's was the first post I have read today. Now I have lovely images in my head (and smells!)

You have a great day. Michele sent me.

WordWhiz said...

I wouldn't tell you. I don't like to be the bringer of bad tidings. I'd just hold my breath!

:-)

I hope that sinus infection clears up soon!! Feel better. (And best apologize to the cats!)

srp said...

I remember "trying" to smell my breath before a date and not being very successful. My sense of smell is so damaged from chronic sinus and formaldehyde pickling, this didn't bother me at all! LOL. ;)

Mildred Garfield said...

What a time you are having! I hope your recovery goes smoothly now, enough already.

Years ago when I was dating my husband to be, he told me that I had "Bad Breath", referred me to his periodontist who found the cause, it was a severe gum problem that my local dentist was not aware of.

I still visit the periodontist regularly and have my husband to thank for finding the cause of the odor and saving ALL my teeth.

Carmi said...

Now you know why the web cam stays OFF most of the time. Some forms of "presence" are just too invasive.

We'll all be here no matter what your meds do to you.

atpanda said...

You poor thing w/ all the sickness and now the smell. I'm sure its not THAT bad. ;-) Hope you're feeling up to snuff quickly!!
Michele sent me.

Chatty said...

I am an altoid, scope, aquafresh junkie. Really bad breath makes me gag, so I guess I really wouldn't have to tell you. You would know. LOL Stopping by via Michele. :)

Laura said...

LOL! I just had to laugh. I bet that has happened to all of us at some point in time. Would I tell you? I dont think so!! But I might have to sit wayyyy across the room! j/k

Claude said...

LOL! Hope you are feeling better!
This reminds me of the time when we got our cat. He smelt so bad that we decided to give him a bath. He took it quite nicely, but hated the smell of the shampoo and licked every inch of himself as soon as we were finished. AND the smell came back. It turned out he had gingivitis and that was the origin of the smell!

Pirate said...

God has denied me the opportunity to smell. So I have no idea what you're talking about.

brendalove@gmail.com said...

Poor Judy - you have really been through it the past week or so. Don't worry about the bad breath...that's why God invented Listerine!

sage said...

Interesting... if Billy Gates introduce "smellavision" I hope you can turn it off like I do the sound (which I leave off unless I want to listen to something). Glad you're recovering.

Merle said...

Hi Judy ~~ Glad you are on the mend at
last. You must have been very ill to come up with that bad breath. And a lot
of medicines will do that also.
Cheers, Merle.

goldenlucyd said...

Kenju,
So did you change the litter? Glad you're feeling better and less stinky.
Here's a great new Elderblogger: http://Shahbazim.blogspot.com
I think he's great.

joared said...

Your tale was sickingly replusive which, of course, makes it really good writing, 'cause that's the way it is ... having lived with chronic sinus problems for more years than I can remember.

When mine kick in, I get a low grade temp. (considerable number of degrees below normal.) Difficult to convince my new Dr. there is a problem, until it reaches a point I have a temp above normal. Not that I'm that anxious to go on antibiotics less they wear out their effectivenesss, I just don't want it to get so bad.

I carry lemon menthol drops in my pocket now, all the time. I pop one in my mouth for use when I am in close proximity to other individuals, which is daily and frequently on a 1:1 basis.

Do feel better soon.

LilRed said...

Hola! Here from Michele's! I know exactly the smell you're talking about. In fact, a few weeks ago I had a cold and made sure not to get too close to anyone for fear of my breath being offensive!

Peter said...

Hi Judy, you must be getting better, (despite the smell) you're sense of humour is coming back too.

Carolyn said...

Oh, this hit me right between the eyes, lol! You may remember I just got over pneumonia? The nose spray did the same thing to me. After my sinuses cleared out, odors of every type became stronger. While the coffee smelled better, unfortunately everything else did not! LOL!

Angie said...

Hahaha .. you must be feeling better!

Malinda777 said...

Glad you are better. You are among friends here, no matter how you smell :)

Ash said...

I am sorry you have been sick, but glad you are feeling better! It takes guts to post something that raw! LOL
I am adding you to my blog links (have meant to do so for some time)...now go use some mouthwash! :)