Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Investment Tips

Sent to my email by Hope, who doesn't have a blog, but should!




Investment tips for 2006...for all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations in 2006.

1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R.Grace Co. will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.

2.) Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly, Warner Cracker.

3.) 3M will merge with Goodyear and and become: MMMGood.

4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa.

5. FedEx is expected to join its major competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP.

6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become: Fairwell Honeychild.

7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: Poupon Pants.

8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become: Knott NOW! And finally...

9. Victoria's Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new name: TittyTitty BangBang

13 comments:

Peter said...

Hi Judy, I'll have to jetison these from my files, I had intended to post them but first in best dressed!!

bornfool said...

lol. Very clever. I'm trying to think of one but I'm drawing a blank.

dorothy rothschild said...

tee hee

srp said...

These are great. My favorites are the FedUP and the TittyTittyBangBang.
LOLOLOL

srp said...

These are great. My favorites are the FedUP and the TittyTittyBangBang.
LOLOLOL

goldenlucyd said...

I needed a laugh before going to the dentist this morning. This worked nicely. Thanks, Judy!
lucyd

Suburban Turmoil said...

Oh this is hilarious, Judy! I've missed you, but I've been thinking about you and meaning to stop by!

Jamie Dawn said...

Those are so funny! I've never read those before.
The last one really is a great one to end on.
End with a BANG!!

millie garfield said...

Thanks for some great laughs.

You are always full of surprises. I never know what I am going to find on your blog.

Great stuff.

Anonymous said...

as i'm sitting here slowly falling asleep on my keyboard i was happy to come across a laugh. ha. thanks!

Beverly said...

Those are so great. I had seen those somewhere a long time ago, but had forgotten them. LOL

OldLady Of The Hills said...

Very Very Funny!

Catherine said...

I once saw a list of potential law firms drawn from names of registered lawyers. The only one I can recall is "Downey, Ault, Bull and Bush". Anyone remember that song?