Sunday, February 19, 2006

The Waffle House and the Wacky Waitress



edit below
Today, as we drove back to Raleigh from my son's home, we stopped at a Waffle House for lunch; not a common place for us but it will do in a pinch when I am craving a waffle. We have a history with Waffle House; when the children were small, I would take them at least once a week to a Waffle House for lunch or afterschool snack. They hated it. They would beg to go to McDonalds or Hardees; places I shun whenever possible. My middle child was the worst at whining about having to eat there. The others tolerated it, but she really professed a hatred for the place. Funny thing is, she came to love it, and her first husband told me that whenever they were on a trip, she would ask to stop at a Waffle House. I marvelled at how quickly they can change their minds! Perhaps her childhood memories of the place changed her attitude toward it.

The waitress at the Waffle House today was one in a million. After we ate, and she was totalling our check, she opened a conversation by saying.....
"Where are you from?"
I replied, "Raleigh......not too far from here" and asked her where she was from.
She said, "I'm not from here - I'm not from this planet."
I said, "You aren't? Well, where are you from?" and she answered....
"Do you remember Mork and Mindy?" I said that I did, and then she said....
"I'm from the planet next to Ork. I've been waiting for ET to come and get me."
As Mr. kenju and I sort of chuckled at that, she said....."I live with a snake."
I said, "Would that be a human snake or a reptile?" and she replied
"Well, a human too, but I meant a real one. He was this long and about that big around" (as she made hand signals to measure 10-12 feet and 5" in diameter). I had nothing to say about that, figuring that anything I could come up with would just egg her on to even greater flights of fancy. So we paid the check and left.

If you ever write a book, you might first do cultural research in various Waffle Houses across the country. Some of the most interesting looking (and often revolting) people hang out there; both as customers and employees. I suspect their lives would be fodder for some interesting (but hopefully not revolting) stories. I'm laughing already!
To answer a few questions: yes, she said it with a straight face; a face like a road map, I might add. She looked rather ancient, although considering my age, I should be kinder than to say that....LOL. I doubt she was on drugs (unless it was diuretics and heart meds) and yes, Naomi, it might have been a sugar high from all that syrup!

34 comments:

Malinda777 said...

Funny. Hope your son had a wonderful B-Day. Here again from Michele.

mar said...

Wonderful! I remember Mork and Mindy and loved them, just as I love waffles as well. Great story! Talk about a waitress with imagination. Michele sent me this time, but I am here very often!

poopie said...

Never a dull moment!

Carmi said...

Nanoo-nanoo. I'll keep that in mind the next time I go into a Waffle House. You really do learn so much about humanity by getting out there and interacting with people.

Cool stuff!

My own Waffle House experience is decidedly less interesting:

http://writteninc.blogspot.com/2005/03/vacation-images-giants-of-sky.html

Lisa said...

ROFL! Oh my gosh! Do you really think she thought she was from Ork, or was she just pulling your leg?

Daydreamer of Oz said...

Lol....When we were teenagers our favourite thing was the Waffle House songs in the jukebox...Pretty lady waiting for me at the Waffle House
Definitely an *interesting* place to go ;)

Kat said...

That is just unbelievable!!! I wonder what drugs she's on. Maybe she just makes things up to mess with customers' heads so they have a story to tell later.

Terri said...

I've always said truth is stranger than fiction! Great story!

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

That was an interesting encounter, wasn't it! One never knows what one will encounter in a Waffle Place, I guess! (lol) Do you suppose it has something to do with all that syrup?? ?

The Torch Singer said...

ha!

when i was in Korea....they had a waffle house...
only it was called

THE WAPPLE HOUSE!!!

Michele sent me

srp said...

Did she manage to tell you all this with a straight face? The Waffle House in Columbus had a trio of waitresses that could have passed for the Supremes. They had a sing song routine down for their orders. The one I try to stay away from is Denney's unless you have no where to go and two or three days to get there.... the absolute slowest service. I could go to the farm, gather the eggs, drive home, and cook the meal faster than they did.
May the "force" be with you.

goldenlucyd said...

Love your yarn-spinning. I'll visit often, I know. Thanks for your warm welcome. "See" you soon!
All the best!
Lucy

mar said...

Hi, Michele sent me your way this morning. Mmm, a waffle would be perfect with my coffee!

The Mistress of the Dark said...

Oh lordy! That's a good one..I think I'm off to the Waffle House for some entertainment now.

Star said...

Too funny. Maybe that's how she gets through the day at the Waffle House. My daughter lived briefly in Georgia and became addicted to the Waffle House.

Robin said...

Hmmm, I heard a rumour that they deep fry pecan pie? yum. I used to love going to Waffle house for breakfast when I was driving through or living in the south. Must have been the mystique of having Pork chops available as an option for breakfast!! I'm here from Michele's!

Scouser said...

Woah, now what makes you think she wasn't from the planet next to Ork. Stranger things have happened on this wierd planet. Unfortunately she'll be waiting a long time for ET to rescue her as he went home nearly 30 years ago. You ought to go back and find out if she was the pilot of the UFO which crashed at Roswell all them years back. Michele sent me but I will be coming back on my own next time.

Denise said...

Very funny experience! I wonder, with folks like that, if they aren't the smarter ones, really, because I doubt they're troubled by the stresses of everyday life. :-)

Thanks for your kind comment on my journal - very much appreciated!

David ParsonsWV said...

I am a Waffle House fan for their two eggs over easy, hash browns, and grits breakfast. I have also encountered several "different" waitresses at these establishments. My favorite Waffle House is in Salisbury, NC, right off the interstate. I often take route 601 to Mt. Airy for a few days away from Florida. There is a waitress at this Waffle House who puts on a one woman show. She is a hoot. I have never been to any Waffle House that had dullards working there.

ribbiticus said...

haha! now you made me crave for waffles! :)

YellowRose said...

I've never eaten in a Waffle House, but this makes me very curious!! LOL

moon said...

I just want to know if she served u some BEELZAAABOB for desert lmao....Great post..NANOO NANOO till next time.

Inanna said...

Hahhahahaa... oh, I love America! Happy birthday to your beautiful son!

OldHorsetailSnake said...

I hated cauliflower until I tasted it.

Wordnerd said...

My kids adore the whole Waffle House experience -- the rat-a-tat manner in which the waitresses (sorry, these gals are pros and would not want to be called "servers") call off the orders to the cooks, the whole thing. Glad you got an order of entertainment on the side!

Pirate said...

I love the wairess already. Whenever i am asked of my vocation or doings by a stranger I always reply that I am a Pirate of course.

Jamie Dawn said...

My Hubby loves Waffle House hash browns. He introduced our family to Waffle House some years ago. I've since eaten there with my mom & dad & brother & my best friend. My friend hated it. The one we went to was a real dive! We've eaten there as a family only a few times. We've seen some real characters!

Carrie said...

Hey... don't meant to sound opinionated... have I told you lately how much I enjoy your blog?? You're quite interesting

Shane said...

at least it wasn't chicken and waffles.

Karen said...

No Waffle Houses here but we've eaten in places with the same cliental, it's kinda fun.

Joy said...

How very strange and entertaining.

Angie said...

Waffle House is the same in every town. When you walk in you know exactly what to expect. 2am after a long night on the town nothing is better than Waffle House except maybe Krystals. The tales I could tell ... but I won't!

Miss Cellania said...

The Waffle House in Raliegh, NC refused to serve my family last summer. After a few choice words, we left, another hour behind schedule. It was the next day while telling the story to others that I first realized it might have been racism. I kicked mtself for being so unaware.

utenzi said...

Racism? At a Wafflehouse? Hell, they serve goats and pigs there--I doubt there's anything remotely human that you can't find in a Wafflehouse. In fact, remotely human describes them well.