have changed since I went to school!
Titanic versus My Life
Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" & "My Life" by Bill Clinton. One smart aleck student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories! His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report:
Titanic: $29.99 Clinton: $29.99
Titanic: Over 3 hours to read Clinton: Over 3 hours to read
Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe. Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
Titanic: Jack is a starving artist. Clinton: Bill is a bullshit artist.
Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar. Clinton: Ditto for Bill.
Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined. Clinton: Ditto for Monica.
Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit. Clinton: Let's not go there.
Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry. Clinton: Monica's forced to return her gifts.
Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life. Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember Jack.
Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen. Clinton: Monica...ooh, let's not go there, either.
Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death. Clinton: Bill goes home to Hilary...basically the same thing.