Thanks to all of you who weighed in with opinions and shared your own family situations in support of telling this guy that he has a sister. I think he should know, but Mr. kenju is still unsure. He has read all your comments, and he will discuss it with the only other family member who knows about it, and then he will make his decision whether to tell or not.
The people involved are getting on in years; the woman who had the out-of-wedlock baby girl is surely deceased, and we don't know the name or whereabouts of the half-sister - or indeed if she is alive. If she is not, as someone pointed out, it might be best not to tell.
Each of you brought up some points we had not considered, as I knew you would. I am blown away by the thoughtful kindness you show every day, but especially at times like this. Again, thanks for your willingness to help.
Now please scroll down for a post that might be just a little bit more jolly!
10 comments:
I agree (after reading down) that the half-sister's existence should be revealed.
And after reading the jollier Ditto post? I like the sentiment, but have to add that the people who haven't updated in more than a week NEED to WRITE more.
Michele sent me tonight.
Happy New Year!
Michele says hi
You are of course welcome. Indeed it is for you that I am a lazy blogger (just kidding). Have you considered Bloglines, or some other blog notifier? You keep a list of all your favorites, and it tells you when someone has posted. That saves from clicking on every blog everytime. And you can keep your list private if you don't want a blogroll on your site. Plus you can read if right from the loglines site if you choose too. Saves some more clicking.
It took me months to decide to let relatives know of the skeletons I found in the closet. One elderly cousin chewed me out and she went to her grave at age 103 still mad at me.
An uncle gave me a $500 contribution to help with all my research expense, then a couple of months later suggested I omit the fact that his brother was a fly-by-night con artist. I took his money but not his suggestion.
Michele sent me over, Judy. Hi!
I know it can be an emotionally charged situation but I think people should know about their relatives. An indiscretion a half century ago shouldn't be a problem now--but maybe older folk view things differently. Good luck to your husband in making his decision!
I forgot to ask about whether the half sibling could be found or not. It may be frustrating for the man to know and then have no way to find her, added on to the other revalations. I'm from micheles.
Thanks for stopping by my place and commenting. I hope you'll return soon. The sister dilemma is something we have dealt with in our marriage. At little different as my husband has some connection with his daughter but as more of an uncle than the biological father. Our son has a great relationship with her and knows she is his half sister. I am in frequent touch with her via e-mail and snail mail. We exchange birthday and Christmas gifts and we love her two little girls, my husband's biological grandchildren.
It's wierd to outsiders but works out well for all of us involved. I figure a person can't have enough people in their lives that love them.
I missed that post (darn it) but I hope that you come to a resolution soon.
I wanted to stop in and wish you a VERY happy New Year. I hope that 2007 is bright and shining!
A Very Happy 2007!
All the best to you and your family! Many hugs!
It is his decision after all.
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