Monday, May 07, 2012

Extreme Foundations...

No, not  the kind needed for super-tall buildings - the type a woman of a certain age needs when she is dressing for a fancy party. In other words:   ultra-strong, industrial-strength girdles. 

I sure do wish I had invented Sp*nx. I don't know what they cost to manufacture, but the prices are way up there!  I suspect the woman who came up with the idea is making millions, or soon will. 

Part of my trepidation about paying those prices is whether or not I can manage to wear it the entire night without heaving it into the nearest trash can, as I did one hot night in DC, 25 years ago. We were attending the 25th Georgetown reunion and the party was staged in a room that held hundreds but wasn't equipped to cool the place if more than 50 were present. And to add to the misery, the temperature was still in the 90's at 7pm, with humidity to match. I think I wore the girdle until 9pm, but then I simply couldn't stand the heat and compression any longer and I took myself off to the nearest ladies room, removed the girdle and tossed it into the trash. I never looked back or regretted that either, until the next time I needed to wear one and had none. 

Last year I bought a knock-off version of the better brand and it wasn't large enough. I could barely take a breath when I had it on and it was so difficult to get on and remove that I had to make sure I didn't need to use the restroom while I was wearing it  (an impossible situation for those aforementioned women of a certain age) amiright?  

So let's hope that the one I bought today is bearable for the whole evening. You see, I need it three nights in a row......lol

10 comments:

Kay Dennison said...

I have an excellent solution. I don't wear anything that would require such things. My evening clothes are bought with my philosophy of accentuate the positive and camouflage the negative. (No one's seen my waist in years.) And black is a big factor, of course!! That said, I'm still wearing a size 10 these days and that's not too bad at 5'10" (and shrinking).

Grannymar said...

Judy, I suggest you try it out for a day at home first.

OldLady Of The Hills said...

Oh My, Judy..I don't envy you one bit!! Three Nights In A Row??
I haven't worn any kind of "garment" like that for soooo very many years---like maybe 50 years or more.....So, I do not envy you one bit!
I will keep GOOD positive thoughts for you, my dear....I hope it works well, in every way.

LL Cool Joe said...

The lengths you women go to, to look good! I bet you don't need the girdle at all.

Colleen said...

Why?
As women of a "certain age" we deserve to enjoy ourselves and not suffer needlessly.
Try your clothes on without it and I'll bet you will look wonderful.

Star said...

Three nights in a row! Bless you woman !

Granny Annie said...

Reminded me of the time I attended a high school dance. My date's car broke down on our way home and we had to walk for help. I slipped off my shoes and my hose and garter belt and threw them on the seat of the car. My dad went back with my date to reclaim the broken car and found my undergarments. I will never forget the look on his face as he walked in the house, glared at me, and handed the garter belt and hose to my mother. I said it then and I'll say it now, NOTHING HAPPENED!!!

Pat said...

Good luck with that Judy. I still have nightmares about the roll-ons we wore in the fifties (and I was skinny then)and trying to run for a bus in one.
A decent bra and that's me done.
Just remembered I used to wear a waspie - a waist clincher - for photographs till I suspected it was giving me bags under the eyes - the fat has to go somewhere:)

Anonymous said...

Judy, Judy, Judy--Don't you deserve to spend your time in comfort? I've not worn a girdle since pantyhose came to market about 50 years ago or so when I was in my early 20s. Better you than me!
Cop Car

joared said...

I gladly gave up girdles, garter belts, later panty hose and I'll never wear them again -- I don't care what's fashionable. Comfort comes first for me. I've long had enough of the spike heels and sheath dresses. I looked great then, but can still look good now without all the undergarments with other styles. But...to each his own, if that's what you prefer.