Sunday, September 03, 2006

My Most Embarrassing Moments


This is a repost from 2-22-05, back in the blog's infancy, when I had no readership. Enjoy!

When I was about 12, our local YWCA had dances on Friday nights for junior-high schoolers. One hot summer, I remember my group deciding to leave the Y and walk down the street to a theater where a "racy" film from Sweden was playing, called "Wild Strawberries". We did not have permission to leave the Y, of course, so little did we know that as soon as we left, they called all our parents and told them where to find us. We had been in the theater about 40 minutes, watching what passed for soft-core po*n in those days, but would probably be PG-13 now, when suddenly I saw my Mom enter from one of the side exits. She scrunched up her eyes trying to see me and I didn't duck quickly enough. Spotting me, she marched up the aisle like a storm-trooper, grabbed me by the ear and literally pulled me from the theater. Up to that time I had never been so embarrassed, but I topped that one many years later.........

Embarrasing moment number two came after I was married and had my first child. My husband and I had been invited to an event sponsored by a group to which his bosses' wife belonged, and then we were to go to breakfast afterward, at the home of another work associate. My babysitter was a married woman, who told me that she shouldn't be out too late due to her husband's back trouble (he had a slipped disc). As we were preparing to leave the breakfast, someone asked me why we had to leave so early - and I assure you I was stone cold sober, though you may never believe it - I replied that my babysitter's husband was in bed with a "stripped dick". People rolled in the floor, holding their bellies and (though mortified) so did I. The laughter didn't die down for an hour.

Do you have any similarly embarrassing moments in your past? Tell us about them.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

How about the time me and 2 other members of my family stood in a closet on a ferry boat thinking it was an elevator!

kenju said...

Colleen, that's hilarious! The stuff of which movies are made.

Azgreeneyes said...

What embarrassed me the most was when my father came out to visit my family, and my 5 year old explained to him about the time he caught momm and daddy 'wrestling'. Dad didn't get it at first, so my wonderful husband proceeded to enlighten him! I was mortified!

Here via Michele's

OldLady Of The Hills said...

That is priceless Judy...I mean the second Embarassing Moment! Hilarious!
I can't say I have had anything quite like those...one of mine is just too complicated to tell in a comment, but suffice it to say a bad mouthed an actress I had worked with who was really really bad in a particular show and I didn't realize I was saying this to her Best Friend...He looked at me and if looks could kill....! Then almost right after that, I was telling a couple of other people at this same gathering how I had just embarassed myself, etc...and told the story of how bad that actress was again, and one of THAT group told me that he too was a good friend of hers!
I never told that story again without finding out ahead of time if anyone I was telling it to knew that particular actress! (this happened a good akmost 40 years ago...and it is still an embarassment to me, even though everything I said was absolutely true! lol)

carmilevy said...

You are hilarious, Judy. You must have been beet red after uttering that classic term.

My most embarrassing moment? I've had many. I think one of the worst was discovering that I accidentally forwarded a rather edgy e-mail thread to the object of my edginess. A colleague and I were whining in text about one of the obnoxious sales reps. I must have had a Freudian moment, because I included said sales rep in the CC: field at one point.

He wasn't pleased. I ate a lot of crow to regain his trust.

Now I leave any personal beefs out of e-mail. That was one of my most profound workplace lessons learned.

Malinda777 said...

3 actually...

#1. Racial lesson learned hard! In junior high, early high school, I used to sit with a black girl every day. At a different stop on another side of town, (who knew people's families didn't all live together)... we picked up this horribly ugly little "white girl".

She was disheveled, hideous, and very odd... I made some rude comment about the ugly white girl and the next day my friend didn't sit with me and gave me a LONG letter. That white girl was her albino handicapped black sister that lived with the other divorced parent.

Took years to get over that one.

2. I skipped school ONCE, like you... my mother was in the school parking lot when I returned and put me in the car by my hair and ear and made quite a scene.

3. My first time water skiing! I won't get graphic with that whole 30mph douche enema story when you're too afraid to stand up! Thank god lake water is clear and clean!

utenzi said...

I can't think of anything really embarrassing in my past--though there's incidents that seemed really bad at the time, Judy. Probably stuff like when your Mom dragged you out of the theatre. After a few years those are more warm and funny though.

The incident at the company breakfast just seems funny--but maybe back then things were a little different. ;-)

Michele sent me, Judy!

Moon said...

My first bf...came to help my mom move something for her. he had a Vega car..so he put the back seat down...and it made for a very long back...(a person could lie down comfortably when the seat was down)...my mom looked at the back, then looked at me..then looked at the back... just in my earshot she said ...Hmmm, It's one thing to be a virgin, its another to do EVERYTHING else though. I WAS MORTIFYED..but said nothing, my red face said it all.

Eddie said...

I suppress my most embarrassing moments out of my mind as right after they happen - daily.

MaR said...

It is a nice thing that we can laugh about our embarrassing moments with a time perspective!!! you go a step further and you share them with us, thanks for a good laugh! :)

sage said...

yeah, I've seen wild strawberries, a Bergeman classic and would probably be rated pg-13, if that

Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh...that is too hilarious! I have a few that come to mind but are to long to leave here. I like when that moment in life comes about where you can look back and laugh about it!
Enjoy your day!
Here from Michele's today.

Anonymous said...

These were a riot, Judy. We had dances at the Y also....called them Teen Town.
I recall being a new mom, living in an apt. was home alone and heard "somebody" enter the front hall of the 2 story apt. bldg. They didn't go upstairs and they didn't knock on my door...convinced it was a burgler or worse, I called the cops. Only to find out it was a huge dog, that had managed to push the outside door open, but couldn't get back out. And yup, the cops were laughing when I opened my door to discover the intruder.

Tracie Nall said...

I'm too chicken to share any of my really embarassing moments, but I have to admit that I really enhoyed reading about yours! :)

srp said...

You've seen pictures of the girl with glasses trying to go without them and walking into a glass door without seeing it? Yep, that was me.

Chancy said...

Judy That is a riot. And ouch that must have hurt...:)

Tia said...

OMG!!! I just about fell of my chair!!!!!!!!! Whew!!!!!!! That's, um, embarrasing!!!!!!!!!!!! And hilarious!!!!! Hmmm... you know what they say about Freudian Slips now, don't you?.... What were YOU thinking of?

Shephard said...

Oh! That is hilarious! I have nothing nearly as funny. lol
~S