He Needed Spellcheck!

When I was in the fifth grade, the school had a policy of having the classes draw names and give presents to each other at Christmas time. One of the boys in my class got my name. He knew me not only from school, but from church too, as we had been in Sunday School classes together for years, along with his twin brother. So his whole family knew me and my parents.

They teased me unmercifully all the time, and earlier that year they had begun to call me a name they thought was funny. Naturally, they howled with laughter and nearly rolled in the floor every time they called me that - as little boys are wont to do. I now realize that they must have liked me a lot to show me so much attention, but at the time, I was miserable over it.

On the day we were to exchange gifts, the teacher chose one classmate to read the gift tags and hand out the presents. Everyone was breathless with anticipation to see who got their name and what the present would be. Soon, the child called out my name, reading "This card says, 'To Judy the Cutie' from L_____C_____. "

Everyone in the class burst into explosive laughter and pointed to LC with derision. He was so embarrassed that he turned red as a beet in the face - and so did his twin. I blushed a little too, somewhat confused at the terminology he used. You see, his usual epithet for me was "Cootie".

A few days later, his mother told my mother that she knew what he was planning for the card, so when he asked her how to spell "cootie"- she told him "cutie". Served him right, don't you think?

Years later, at our 25th high school reunion, I told him and his wife about that card. He claimed no memory of it at all, and blushed when I mentioned it. Huh, just like a man to plead innocence!

See post below for the gift card!