Wednesday, September 28, 2005

A Remarkable Obituary

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Mr. Common Sense. MrSense had been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that life isn't always fair.


Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are in charge). His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Mr. Sense declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student; but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Finally, Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, she spilled a bit in her lap, and was awarded a huge financial settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust, his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on; if not, join the majority and do nothing.

Another email jewel!

23 comments:

Bec of the Ladies Lounge said...

Hello Judy, back to visit you via Michele's and I love the piece on common sense - do you mind if I come back and copy it to send to a friend? let me know!

By the way, although I don't think Australia is (yet) as litigious as the US, our honeymoon eight years ago was marred by our delightful guesthouse hosts being forced to pay a settlement to a fellow guest because a teapot handle had cracked and splashed a small patch on her thigh... turned out she was a legal secretary and got straight on the phone to her bosses. My husband was splashed too, but all we got was their gratitude!!

Gerbera Daisy said...

I miss Mr. Sense.

Bec of the Ladies Lounge said...

thanks kenju - if you try cous cous make sure you get the instant variety ... and once you get the hang of it you will never go back (on this, kim and i agree!!)

Shannon said...

Good Morning Kenju! Here via Michele's! Do send my condolences along to the Sense fmily...he will be missed!

bornfool said...

Sad, because it's true.

Marie said...

Isn't that the truth?

We just had a conversation with our son's pediatrician about how so much of good parenting is common sense.

Michele sent me today! Happy Thursday!

rugdesigner said...

I've been wondering what happened to him...

Laura said...

I say we bring him back via reincarnation!

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Oh, my, yes. I nominate as the newest oxymoron:

Rational judge.

Lesser_Lumpkin said...

Indeed the loss of Mr. Sense is a greevious blow that we shall be feeling for many years to come but as always there is still work to be done. I'm afraid that a close associate of Mr. Sense has fallen violantly ill and may be on his way to the same outcome. His name is Mr. Justice.

The Lumpy

Jamie Dawn said...

That is a jewel, indeed.
I hope that a miracle will occur and somehow Common Sense can be raised from the dead.
It doesn't seem likely though.

Karen said...

Hiya Kenju. Michele sent me. Very clever post indeed!

vicki said...

Smart post- I too miss Common Sense.

utenzi said...

Michele sent me here, Judy, before I could come on my own.

What a cute little piggie you have over there.

I certainly agree with the sentiments you have in your post, Judy, but I don't think that things are as bad as they might seem. The media likes to pick up on outrageous stories and that sort of thing builds on itself. The stories will all go away with time and life really isn't that bad day-to-day, which is the true measure of whether Common Sense still lives...despite the seeming weirdness that exists out there.

utenzi said...

HOLY CRAP! That's a nasty sound your pig makes, Judy. I just poked it--and you better believe I'll leave it be from now on. Yikes. On the other hand, I do like making it roll around in the mud. Kinda reminds me of New Orleans. My little pet plays dead when you poke it too much.

Inanna said...

Now, that's the most sense anyone has made in a long time!

Peter said...

Too true to be really funny Judy, it coinsides well with my last post too.
You have quite an Australian readership I see, Hi to Bec & Kim.

Indigo said...

LOL! Michele sent me. I hope she's feeling beter.

srp said...

You have no idea how true this post is. I can confirm from personal experience that Mr. Sense is gone and unfortunately it seems he is almost forgotten.

utenzi said...

Anon seems rather grumpy.

Weary Hag said...

You know Judy, I heard a rumor that Mr. Sense has an offspring - equally as wise as he. Only problem is, if nobody finds the little guy and nurtures him through life, he too may go unnoticed.
Wonderful, wonderful post. Just great!

Star said...

Good post. Point well made!

Green-Eyed Lady(GEL) said...

Sensible post full of no nonesense. Thx 4 sharing.