I let Molly (my grand dog) out on the deck this afternoon and decided to go out myself for a bit of fresh air. Molly made a bee-line for the grassy area to the right, and I, sensing movement to my left, turned and saw four deer in the side yard.  Three were lying down and one was standing guard.

Whipping out my phone, I took a photo. I tried to crop it so the deer would be more visible, but it isn't working.

I watched the deer for about 2 minutes, during which time they all got on their feet, but didn't run away. The funny thing to me was that Molly never saw or heard them. By the time she came back to the door, the deer had disappeared.

Tonight, I went to put her out for a bathroom break. As I opened the inside door, I saw a flash of white. Sammy the vagabond cat saw Molly through the storm door and ran to the back side of the deck. I kept the storm door closed for a few seconds and then I saw a flash of black go by. The feral cat who is Sammy's almost constant companion also ran to the back of the deck. I gave them time to get away before I opened the storm door so Molly could get out. She chased them all over the deck, but they jumped off and she lost interest. She didn't even bark, which is unusual. I guess Sammy will keep his distance for a week or two.  :-(  I'll miss him.

Note: the two-toned deck railings happened when the tree fell on  the deck and house in 2011 and we had to have part of the rails replaced.

Some Thoughts Engendered By Reading...

My book club has just finished reading Gone Girl, the mystery novel by Gillian Flynn. We met last night to talk about the book. Everyone brings a dish to share and we outdid ourselves this time! I took shrimp salad, served in a leaf of endive, which is also good on crackers.   With  full stomachs, we began the discussion. 

I had found a passage in this book which spoke directly to me  (or so it felt):

" There is an unfair responsibility that comes with being an only child - you grow up knowing you aren't allowed to disappoint, you're not even allowed to die. There isn't a replacement toddling around; you're it. It makes you desperate to be flawless, and it also makes you drunk with power. In such ways are despots made."

I don't know if I could be called a despot, but I know that mr. kenju  (and my children) would say I can be. But I grew up knowing that if I did something wrong, it would displease my mother greatly (and out of all proportion.) I was not ever allowed the luxury of being wrong because it reflected badly on her. She was very concerned about what other people thought, and always wanted to be "well thought of".  The fact that I could be less than perfect was not to be known by the outside world  (or even most of her family, God forbid.) 

I've wondered if that was solely because I was her only child - or if it could also have something to do with the fact that I was adopted. I asked the members of the book club how many of them were only children. There was one other woman who was an only child, plus a woman who grew up as the only girl in a family of boys, and both felt they were treated just as the character in Flynn's book and I were. 

So what is your experience? Are you an only child? Were you treated in this fashion? How do you think it has affected your adult life, and has it made any difference in how you raised your children?  

Please answer in the comments....or if you write a blog post about it.....please send the link to me.

A DUH Moment....(or The Birth of an Idiot)

Do you have two checking accounts?  Have you ever recorded checks or deposits into the wrong account? 

For two months, I have not been able to figure out why one of the accounts wouldn't balance. I was off by $132 and it was maddening. I wracked my brain, re-added and subtracted all the amounts since the last time the account was in balance - and I still couldn't figure it out. 

After checking again and again, I discovered that a check for $32 I wrote in December had never been cashed or deposited. I emailed the person and asked her to deposit that check soon. She did. But I was still off by $100.

I pay a bill on-line; my gasoline card. I paid $100 on it two months ago and last month I paid again. Both payments were showing as paid on the gas card account, but the $100 payment was never deducted from my account. I debated contacting the gas card people and/or the bank, but decided to let it roll for a month or two to see what happened. (Thank Heaven I did wait....lol)

I checked my balance on-line this morning and decided to go through my check register once more. I found the line where I had written the amount I paid the gas card - and it hit me  (like a ton of bricks!)

DUH...... what a fool.  I had written it in both check registers!  Of course the account was in balance, because that $100 was not written on that account and never should have been put in the register. I feel like an idiot. What bothers me the most is that it took almost two months for me to realize what I had done. 

So.....sometime next week, I will be closing the account I seldom use, after I contact the gas card people to let them know I will be using a different account to pay that bill from now on. I think it is time for me to close it, even though getting cash is more convenient with that bank. We still have a joint account with them, so I can get cash if necessary. I just have to remember to tell him I did it....lol

Getting old is frustrating, right?

And in case you are wondering, it has been more than two weeks and I am still sneezing, coughing and not sleeping well. I hope you are able to skirt this virus. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. 

Still Sick......but Good Health is on the Horizon

I am still coughing and hacking, but the sneezing has abated somewhat and the headaches and earaches are not as bad as they were. I can see the end of the tunnel.

Thanks for all the well wishes; I am certain I will be okay within a few more days  (If I am not, there will be hell to pay.) I am sick of being sick.

Do all you can to prevent getting this or any other upper respiratory virus; they seem particularly vicious this year.

This has been the longest day in the history of my life. I've slept a lot, but every time I wake up and see the clock, I am amazed at how little time has gone by.  How can it feel like hours when it has been only minutes? I guess I should have turned off the phone. 

A cold (with cough/sore throat/headache/earache) has sidelined me and I have not done a darn thing today that was useful. I was supposed to meet with a woman this afternoon regarding her son's rehearsal dinner, but I had to beg off. No one at the florist shop (nor the groom's mother) needs to be side-lined with what I have; I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. This is day five, I think, and it's about time for it to leave. I have too much to do!

In spite of it all, I have had the munchies today. A cold usually makes me not want to eat much at all, but today I can't seem to get full. I have been drinking hot peppermint tea all day too. I need desperately to go to the grocery, but I can't seem to muster enough energy for that. Grocery shopping is a detested chore for me, even when I feel my best. I will have to do it tomorrow, otherwise my munchies will be cured by default. There will be nothing much to eat. 

I want to be in "clean out and toss" mode, but I don't feel well enough to start again. About all I can do is think about where I might start cleaning out, once I feel well enough to begin. 

One good thing that seems to have come out of this is that my sleeplessness; coupled with tossing and turning seems to have abated. At least it did last night, as I slept the sleep of the dead and woke up in the same position as when I went to bed. I'm sure I must have moved around at some point....lol

Molly, my grand dog is here again, and she is almost as lethargic as I am. She went out on the deck a few minutes ago and couldn't even muster enough energy to bark at the squirrels, who were, despite a misty rain, playing in the woods, running up and down trees and chasing each other. I think she misses her mother. It is both sweet and ridiculous how devoted those two are to each other. But I have six grand dogs and they are all spoiled rotten  (as it should be.)

The Maelstrom...

Most of the time, my bed clothes are neat and nearly undisturbed in the morning; making it look as though no one had slept there.  But lately, I awake with a bed so messy it appears that the gods of thunder, lightning and wind have had their way with it. During the night I wake with covers over my head or strangling my neck; my feet dangling over the end, uncovered and freezing - unless I wear socks to bed. The comforter is either half off the bed, or wadded up into a ball, and I don't know why. 

I have not remembered having any dreams or nightmares lately, otherwise that might provide a clue as to why my sleep habits are so changed. I suppose stress could cause it - and God knows I have enough of that in my life. 

It used to be that my bed looked like the sea in the doldrums in the morning. Making it was easy and quick. Now I have to remake it nearly every day. Do you sleep like a whirlwind - or is your bed a peaceful retreat?  

P.S.  That is not my bed in the photo, but I love that room!

My Sonny Boy Turns Forty-Seven Today

Top: 7 months
Middle: 18 months
Bottom: 11 years

I cannot believe that my sweet, chubby baby boy has been on the planet for that long. I remember the night of his birth like it was yesterday. My due date was early March, but like most pregnant women, I was desperately hoping he would make an early appearance. On the 18th, I felt better than I had in nine months. I cleaned the whole house, I scrubbed floors, I ironed. At midnight, as I sat on the couch watching Johnny Carson's Tonight Show, my water broke. All. Over. Everything. Mr. kenju was already asleep (as usual) and after I woke him to explain what was happening, he put on his robe and proceeded to turn on every light in the house. Every
light.

I called the doctor, who told us to get to the hospital pronto, so we packed my bag, turned off all the lights and got in the car for the 20 minute trip to the hospital. Mr. kenju was so excited that he ran a red light. I told him that wasn't necessary; all we needed was to be stopped by a policeman. I had visions of my baby being born in the rear seat of our old Plymouth sedan, which was not the way I planned it. We arrived about 1 am, and after checking in, we were escorted to the delivery suite by a chatty woman who babbled incessantly about cats. I think she thought I was nervous and that would help to get my mind off the impending birth. She was right. I had NO idea what to expect, though I had been admonished by a doctor I worked with at the time, to read everything I could about the process of labor and childbirth. Fear leads to tense muscles, which prolongs labor. Knowledge alleviates that to some extent. My boy arrived 4 hours later, at 4:50 am.

I am not sure why they taught me about fear and then knocked me unconscious with anesthesia. I was completely out when my boy was born, and to this day, I hate that it happened that way. Even so, the doctor said I was just like the women in Pearl Buck's "The Good Earth"; they dropped the babies out in the fields and went right back to hoeing.

My handsome boy is still built just like he was at eleven; all long bones, sinew and muscle - but no fat whatsoever. He now has a lovely wife and two beautiful daughters of his own. I am so proud of them all.
Have VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Sonny Boy!





(reposted)







(Reposted from six years ago.)