Santa's Reindeer

According to the Alaska Department of Fish
and Game, while both male and female reindeer
grow antlers in the summer each year, male
reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning
of winter, usually late November to mid-
December.


Female reindeer retain their antlers till after
they give birth in the spring.
Therefore, according to EVERY
historical rendition depicting
Santa's reindeer,
EVERY single one of them,
from Rudolph to Blitzen,
had to be a girl.

We should've known...
ONLY women would be able to drag
a fat-ass man in a red velvet suit
all around the world in one night
and not get lost.


The Santa above is another piece of the ephemera I have saved. It was a package of red yarn, for use in tying presents, and was probably from the '70's.